Tag: Communication

Extroverts Married to Introverts – What To Do??

They say opposites attract, which is true – but they usually don’t finish the sentence which ends with “then opposites attack”.

They say opposites attract, which is true – but they usually don’t finish the sentence which ends with “then opposites attack”. So can opposites really have a happy and fulfilling relationship? The answer is yes! You just need to work with each other’s personality type. Let’s say, for example, that you are an extroverted personality type married to an introverted personality type. Using the DiSC model of human behavior, this would mean you are either a “D” (Dominant) or an “I” (Inspiring) personality type married to an “S” (Supportive) or a “C” (Cautious) type. Typically, conflict occurs when there is an event that will involve socializing. The extrovert is all for having a great time and the introvert…. well…. not so much! There is a way to find a happy resolution though! Here are few suggestions:

You can both agree, before going to the event, what time you will leave. This way the introvert will know exactly how long they will need to be sociable. They will also have something to look forward to – which is leaving!
You could also introduce your introverted spouse to someone else who will be there that is similar to their personality type. Make sure they feel comfortable with those around them before taking off to be the life of the party. (Yes “I” types – this is you)

Another idea is to drive separately with the understanding that the introvert can leave as soon as they are ready. This way the extrovert can stay as long as they like without the introvert having to socialize more than they want to. It would be easy for the extrovert to be upset with the introvert for not wanting to socialize, but it’s important to understand their personality type. While the “D” or “I” type might be invigorated by being able to interact, the “S” and “C” types are actually mentally drained by the same activity. It is not something the extroverted personality type should take personally. This is simply the way that introverted personality types are wired! Instead of focusing on the fact they aren’t extroverted like yourself, you should think about some of their strengths. Introverts are great with details, they do a great job when performing and task and much more! Just because they are not extroverted doesn’t mean something is wrong with them. They are just different from you and that is okay! Finding that happy medium that BOTH extroverts and introverts can be comfortable with is sure to make the relationship better for both people! Remember to always let your personality shine!

Angel Tucker is an Expert Personality Profiler, and Certified Human Behavior Consultant. She is the best-selling Author of Stop Squatting With Your Spurs On and the creator of the Four Pals children’s book series. Angel is married to a Lt. Colonel in the USAF and they have four children.

Strategies for Getting Along with a “D” type using DiSC Part 1

“D” personality types are those outgoing, task oriented people who have a bottom line communication style! They can be very difficult to get along with if you don’t know how to effectively communicate with them. Here are some tips for getting along with the “D” personality type.

1. When you are asking them for their opinion on something, or need them to make a decision – use the word “think”. For example, “What do you think about….”. This would be instead of asking how they feel. “D” types make decisions based on logic instead of emotion. If you ask them how they feel, they will probably respond with something like “Well, I think…..”.

2. “D” types want you to be brief, be brilliant, and be gone! Remember time is money when you are dealing with this personality type so don’t try to engage in idle chit chat unless they start the conversation.

3. “D” types don’t like to repeat themselves so listen up the first time when they are giving you information. They also don’t want you to tell them something more than once.

4. If there is bad news you need to tell them, let them know quickly. Don’t worry about them being upset. Oftentimes, they are going to fix the problem anyway.

I hope this gives you some great insights into interacting with “D” personality types. I will include more strategies for interacting with a “D” personality in my next blog!

Angel Tucker is an Expert Personality Profiler and Certified Human Behavior Consultant with over 23 years of experience as an International Speaker. She is also a best-selling Author, award winning Author, mother of 4, and a military spouse.

Strategies for Getting Along with a “D” type using DiSC Part 2

In my most recent post, I listed 4 tips to help create better interactions with the “D” or Dominant personality type. Here are some more tips for getting along with the “D” types!

5. Use words that appeal to their personality! “D” types are attracted to words that emphasize “status and prestige”. Some examples would be: great, powerful, biggest, best, bold. These words peak their interest!

6. Don’t tell a “D” type to do something! When you tell this personality to do something, they didn’t hear what you said. What they heard is “Do you want to fight?” Instead, you can use a few strategies to create that win/win situation:

a. Give them choices, but let them make the decision. For example: Do you want to go to the post office first or would you rather pick up your dry cleaning first?

b. Issue a challenge! When you tell a “D” type they can’t do something, they most likely will do it!

7. Don’t expect perfection! “D” types believe in quantity, not quality. They do something “good enough” then move on to the next project.

8. Keep things moving! “D” personalities get bored very easily so move quickly! They also like to work on more than one thing at a time so keep them busy!

Want to learn more about interacting with the different personality types? Check out my best-selling book titled: Stop Squatting With Your Spurs On! The power to read people, get what you want, and communicate without pain! You can even read a few chapters for free on my blog!

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Angel Tucker is an Expert Personality Profiler and Certified Human Behavior Consultant with over 23 years of experience as an International Speaker. She is also a best-selling Author, award winning Author, mother of 4, and a military spouse.